Pizza Hut has a stuffed crust pizza. I propose a pizza whose crust is stuffed with STUFFING. A turkey and gravy pizza. THIS COULD HAPPEN.
Cook to perfection
I saw this line in a recipe: “Cook to perfection or until brown on both sides.”
Of course, I imagined this: someone’s cooking chicken. It’s lovely. It smells wonderful. They turn up the heat a little bit, and flip it over. Now they start to get a little anxious. Is it brown enough? Or has it gotten too brown? Is it sticking in the pan? IS IT PERFECT?
Then they remember : it’s cook to perfection, OR UNTIL BROWN. And THIS is certainly some shade of brown. They briefly contemplate writing a “50 Shades of Brown” cookbook before moving on to the next step in the recipe.
I’ll bet Chuck Wendig doesn’t have these kinds of problems when HE’S cooking.
The heart wants what the heart wants
Sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants.
And tonight the heart wants picante chicken ramen.
Oh, wait. That would be what the stomach wants.
I’m OK with that.
One more thing…
There is always room for one more thing in the refrigerator, especially if you throw out several fuzzy green unknown objects first.
The infantilization of language
I’m listening to the radio, and I’m hearing this weight-loss ad on the radio. If you’re an adult, that place between your chest and your hips is your stomach, not your tummy. If your tummy is too big, perhaps it got that way by eating too many sammies, or have you been overindulging in psgetti again? Just… STOP, before I have to come over there and make you stand in the corner.
The peril of a vegetarian diet
Perdue is advertising that they feed their chickens an all-vegetarian diet. Admit to being a vegetarian around them at your own risk.
Schroedinger’s avocado
Schroedinger’s avocado: you’re thinking about guacamole. There’s an avocado on the refrigerator. Someone may or may not have already made guacamole. Until you open the refrigerator door to check, the avocado exists simultaneously as both whole AND all mashed up. Kinda like Schroedinger’s cat, only tastier.
What a gallon of pickled eggs looks like
Nearly four dozen of ‘em.
Roast beef sub with provolone cheese, mayo, lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, black olives.
Actually, this is ONE HALF of a sub from Vella’s.
Grilled steak
And what goes with grilled steak? There are lots of good answers to that question, but on Friday, July 30, the answer was tater tots with catsup and Franks Red Hot Sauce, and sliced tomatoes with mayo.