Me to dog, before I go to bed: I need to get up early in the morning.
* * *
1:30 a.m.
Dog: Get up!
Me: This is not what I meant.
Dog: It’s early, and I want to go out.
I guess I should’ve been more specific.
Write with joy
They say “write with joy,” but I say if Joy doesn’t show up, start without her.
These little things remind me of you
Paraphrase of a message I received: “I heard the corpse flower is in bloom in a botanical garden in Colorado. It made me think of you.”
Uh… thanks, I think?
Multitasking?
Watching the Olympics. 400 M individual medley. How can they swim and sing at the same time?
Talent
Watching the Olympics. 400 M individual medley. How can they swim and sing at the same time?
GET DOWN OFF THAT HORSE.
Huh. Just heard a guy on the radio railing against people “standing on their high horse.” I… don’t think that’s how the saying goes. I mean, you can be up on your high horse, but you probably don’t want to STAND once you’re up there.
How a sentence is made
I have been learning about sentences from Gertrude Stein, HOW TO WRITE:
“A sentence is made by coupling meanwhile ride around to be a couple there makes grateful dubeity named atlas coin in a loan.
This is what they all do.”
(In)undating
The word of the night is inundating.
By the way, do you ever wish you could undate someone? I mean, bad date, you wish it’d never happened, you want those hours back? There’d probably be bad unintended consequences to undating. These ideas that alter the fabric of time and space never seem to end up well.
How to travel to an alternate universe
How to travel to an alternate universe:
– see a post on Facebook
– go to look something up in another app or browser tab
– return to Facebook. Facebook will reload you into an alternate universe where you cannot find the original post that you were hoping to respond to
World Donkey Day advice
World Donkey Day advice:
If a donkey asks you to kiss him, claiming he is an enchanted prince?
He’s probably just another talking donkey.