Writes all the things. Most of the things never write back.
When The Sound of Music collides with the current weather forecast in my brain, this is what happens:
Black ice on roads is a thing that I’m hating
Rain that then freezes is not worth creating
Breaking the branches to which the ice clings
Both of these are my least favorite things…
(Try not to picture me in lederhosen yodeling this. Oh, TOO LATE! That’s an image you could have done without.)
I am waiting for the version of The Sound of Music where Maria holds a moonbeam in her hand and the Captain turns into a werewolf.
I am working on a synaesthetic version of THE SOUND OF MUSIC called THE SMELL OF MUSIC.
It will be very popular with dogs.
I’m now working on writing a Doctor Seuss – Doctor Who crossover episode titled “Horton Hears a Doctor Who.”
I went to a house where the welcome mat was turned around backwards. I think this meant “We’re so glad you’re leaving.”
Exciting news! The cats have informed me that the Saturday before Thanksgiving is a holiday called Caterday, when cats feast on all the good food they can eat. They have requested tuna.
The dogs went outside, saw the snow, looked excited, and looked at me. I think they think I was responsible for this somehow.
Yes, dogs. I turned the world into a giant Sno-Kone FOR YOUR BENEFIT. You’re welcome.
I am going to write a story about a group of lovable genius nerds who rebuild an old race car into a flying car.
The title will be The Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Theory.
I am writing a new Thor origin story.
“I worked out really hard to get big and fit.
AND NOW I AM THOR!”
I saw this line in a recipe: “Cook to perfection or until brown on both sides.”
Of course, I imagined this: someone’s cooking chicken. It’s lovely. It smells wonderful. They turn up the heat a little bit, and flip it over. Now they start to get a little anxious. Is it brown enough? Or has it gotten too brown? Is it sticking in the pan? IS IT PERFECT?
Then they remember : it’s cook to perfection, OR UNTIL BROWN. And THIS is certainly some shade of brown. They briefly contemplate writing a “50 Shades of Brown” cookbook before moving on to the next step in the recipe.
I’ll bet Chuck Wendig doesn’t have these kinds of problems when HE’S cooking.