My most recent short fiction.
Me: Mmm! Chili cheese dog! (turns for napkin) Hey! It’s gone!
Dog: (innocent look)
Feed me!
I am going to write a new version of “Little Shop of Horrors” where the things crying “Feed me!” are the little electronic devices awaiting recharging.
Uh oh…
News flash: Mars rover Curiosity takes first test drive, immediately pulled over as unlicensed, uninspected, uninsured.
The powerful cat lobby
The powerful cat lobby is celebrating today at their success in FINALLY getting Curiousity exiled to Mars. Because, you know what Curiousity did to the cat, and cats have LONG memories.
The Supervillain Superstore
I’m watching a James Bond movie, and once again, the henchmen are dressed in matching outfits. Is there a supervillain superstore where they can shop for henchmen uniforms in bulk, or is there a hiring agency where you can get your henchmen on day rates until you’re more established in your villainy?
Schroedinger’s avocado
Schroedinger’s avocado: you’re thinking about guacamole. There’s an avocado on the refrigerator. Someone may or may not have already made guacamole. Until you open the refrigerator door to check, the avocado exists simultaneously as both whole AND all mashed up. Kinda like Schroedinger’s cat, only tastier.
Cat baths and other hazardous activities
Giving a cat a bath is like trying to sharpen a chain saw while it’s running. It will not end well.
~ Tom Plumpton
Choose wisely
You’re all seen Google Ads on the side of various web pages. This is what I saw today:
CUSTOM GENE SYNTHESIS
5 free DNA sequencing reactions with every synthetic gene order
If you see something strange as you’re walking around, perhaps this is the reason. It could be that someone did not choose wisely.
Casting
“My life has a superb cast but I can’t figure out the plot.”
~ Ashleigh Brilliant
Reversible knitting
I was in a bookstore today, and saw a book with the title “Reversible Knitting.” I don’t knit, but I thought, “Brilliant! You make something, you get tired of it, and then you un-knit it and turn it into something else!”
Sadly, that wasn’t what it was about at all.